Recent Posts

• January 06, 2022

  Priorities

  Not doing resolutions this year, or maybe I am but in a way that makes it more vague. The year is six days old and I’m trying to figure out what my priorities are. The big looming thing in the middle of it is a move to Canada in August and all of the colossal life events - selling the flat, shipping the cats, finding a new school, possibly keeping my job?, starting from scratch with bank accounts, driving, credit rating, utilities, everything else - kind of puts “run 200km every month” in the shade (1).

• January 01, 2022

  The Wizard of Oz

  The 4 year old got a book of various bedtime stories for Christmas, and one of them is the Wizard of Oz. They’re all truncated and simplified, but in this edition of Oz, Dorothy, the Scarecrow, Tin Man and Lion make it to the Wizard and he’s just… legitimate. He gives them brains, heart and courage and sends them on their way. (He also sends Dorothy to assassinate another Wicked Witch).

• December 31, 2021

  Twenty Twenty One In Review

  Looks like I did resolutions in December 2020, at the height of Covid. Now that it’s December 2021, at the height of Covid, it’s time to see how they went.

• December 03, 2021

  Sleep

  I picture myself, two or three years from now. By then he’ll be walking, he’ll be having conversations and making very basic jokes. He’ll be in and around the age to start school, we’ll be in a different country. And I’ll be far enough removed from it that I can casually throw out the story to people who are having babies, or having problems with them, with the wise eyes of experience. He was like that, I’d say. He would go to bed around seven, and by ten or half ten, he would wake, shrieking like he’d seen how the world ends. He would be unconsoleable. He would have to be fed, or held down, and cleaned off as he leaked fluids out of his eyes, nose and mouth while continuing to just shriek. And then he’d go quiet. And I wouldn’t sleep at that point, I would go on standby. Waiting for the next one. Sometimes it was at two, sometimes three. He would wake again and his throat would rattle with the force of his rage, eyes still closed. He would continue for an hour, picked up, put down, cleaned up, cleaned out, changed, soothed, wept over, he would continue and continue and continue and then it would end again and I could go back onto standby. It would happen again. If we were unlucky, the hour would begin with five. If we were lucky, seven. He might go on and off for a while but eventually he would be up and clean and so happy, too happy to be mad at, not even aware of what he’d done, and then it’s the beginning of the day and all the things that have to be done have only started. But at least that was a couple of years ago, I’d conclude. Whoever I’m talking to will nod sagely and hope they have it a little better.

• May 18, 2021

  The Canadianification Continues

  Covid vaccines became available to the over 37s in the UK today. I was booked in by 8:44am, getting jabbed next Thursday, May 27. By the time I go home in July I’ll be something like 70% covered, and my parents will be both fully dosed. It’s very much time that I got out of this living room. That is also my dining room. That is also my office. That is also, currently, my bedroom.